A symphony of destruction. From the creators of Gears of War and Painkiller.

You are Grayson Hunt, the once proud cool-headed leader of Dead Echo; a once proud and proficient black ops team ran by the 26th Century Confederation of Planets. But not any more. Turns out Echo’s boss, General Serrano, (who could only be properly defined with words that are far too inappropriate for Toy-TMA) was using their talents to enforce his own totalitarian brand of peacekeeping on the real good guys; something our guys weren’t too happy to find out. Fast forward ten years later, where Captain Hunt is now a guilt ridden drunk of a space pirate and the most wanted man in the galaxy, and all his Dead Echo buddies are… well… dead mostly, save for one, Ishi Sato. After ramming their ship into the engine of Serrano’s precious flagship Ulysses (the Roman name of the Greek warrior Odysseus) our broken antiheroes (Grey mentally, Ishi physically) find themselves crash landing on the abandon resort planet Stygia. And hilarity ensues.

Contrary to popular belief, this is not a Marvel/DC crossover staring Wolverine and Cyborg.

So no, this story isn’t doing anything groundbreaking for an FPS by any stretch of the imagination, but I do feel that it’s worth mentioning that Bulletstorm feels like it purposely sought to be very tongue and cheek. It is almost the opposite effect of the Killzone 3 story, a game that tries so hard to create this huge epic drama on war while keeping a straight face, even when its performance just isn’t up for the task. Bulletstorm however, had no intentions of taking itself seriously, instead letting the gameplay take the reigns, yet the slightest hints of development in these very familiar gaming troupes that define our protagonists felt surprisingly genuine. Remember how I said the flagship was called Ulysses? Well I myself am sensing just a little symbolism with the Odyssey, with Grey being the broken captain in a decade-long mission that leads all of his allies to death.

At the very least, its plot and writing is a heck of a lot more enjoyable than the Gears of War games.

"#%^&, this thing is pissed! What did you do, kill its babies?” “No… wait… maybe?”

You know what IS unique about this game? The setting. Planet Stygia is literally an entire resort planet. Think of it as a rundown Las Vegas: plenty of sunny skies, beautiful waterfalls, miles of countryside, hotels on every corner, exotic plant life, VERY exotic plant life, rampaging thousand-foot-tall monsters, oh yeah, and every single human resident on the planet has mutated into savage gangsters, or worse, cannibals. Have fun.

And fun is exactly what this game delivers. The shooting element of this game runs on a Skill Point system where you score points on all the unique and interesting ways you kill your enemies. Grayson is armed with an electron leash that reels enemies in, as well as both a kick and slide technique, that can all be used to line your target up in slow motion for certain skill shots. If you just try to play this game conservatively like other competitive shooters (or rushing in guns blazing for that matter), you’re going to have some problems. See, your progression relies on your will to experiment, as these skill points are needed for you to pay for new weapons, upgrades, and ammo. Sure there are the typical points for head shot, crotch shot, burn, electrocute, impale, but there’s also points for kicking people off cliffs, throwing them into cacti, feeding them to man-eating-plants, poisoning them with anger toxin so they attack themselves, and let;s not forget the X-Ray.

How many games let you de-fleshitize noobs and NPCs alike? That’s right, one.

For those of you into the online multiplayer crowd, this may seem like a refreshing change of pace. Now, you are not scored by your body count, but more on your style. Yeah, that’s a swell massage to teach gamers: “It’s not about how many people you kill, it’s how you kill them.”

Its already obvious, but I’ll say it anyway. This game is definitely not for kids. It is violent to the third power and the language is unabashedly profane. If you are someone who is even the slightest bit uncomfortable with harsh language, then might I consider spending your time and money elsewhere.

So the game showcases some excellent ideas and amazing action set pieces. A whole lot of them, like the chase from the Ferris wheel in the desert, and the boss fight with the giant plant, are spaced out pretty well in the beginning and middle of the campaign. Too bad the final act doesn’t have anything that really matches those moments. Instead, it jacks up the difficulty by increasing the enemy count, adds some Quick-Time-Events, and calls it a climax. The story’s conclusion, I was pretty much fine with, yet the post-credit scene kind of weirded me out.

Despite all that, I still had a blast with Bulletstorm, and that’s coming from someone who isn’t the biggest FPS fan. I liked the protagonists. I hated the antagonist (in the way you are suppose to). The dialogue, if you can handle it, is colorful and hilarious in its own way. Plus, how can you not have fun with a game that gives you a remote-controlled-robot-T-Rex with laser beams attached to its head?

Want more game reviews? Check these out:

-Doing The PS3 Proud: A Review of Killzone 3

-The Old Is Still New: A Review of Dragon Quest VI

-For The Win: A Review of Marvel vs Capcom 3

I wish I'd been the one to think up this image first, but I'm not.

Happy Saturday everyone! February is ending in the next day or so and that means the beginning of the newest feature here at Toy-TMA: The Too Much Awesome Podcast!

It had been my hope to someday start doing a podcast here. The plan was for last month to be the first episode, but issues with cars (my car specifically) delayed production for a week. After some technical difficulties with the mic, the podcast was recorded and uploaded without any futher troubles (save for a cat scratching in the background).

The link for the podcast can be found here. Once you click the link, you’ll be taken to Mega Upload, a site for files too large to post anywhere else. Type in the code shown to download the file and then wait for it to be cued up for download. Once it’s ready, download the file and listen when and where ever you’d like!

The goal is to have at least one new episode a month, usually falling on the last weekend of the month. It ended up being over 90 minutes, but we’ve got a lot to talk about, so it works. We’ll do our best to improve the sound quality as right now you have to turn the sound up fairly high to hear us clearly, but for now, please enjoy the premiere episode of the Too Much Awesome Podcast!

Sometimes you've just gotta show your bro some love.

Who am I to decide what makes a good game and bad game? I’m about to tell you that Army of Two: The 40th Day is pretty unimpressive as a game.  But who’s to say I’m the correct person to say such a thing? It’s become pretty clear that I’m a Nintendo fanboy and that I’m very bad at First-Person and Third-Person Shooters (Army of Two is a Third-Person shooter), so why am I allowed to have a say on this particular game?

I’m Bitter and It’s Obvious

My opening paragraph may have given you some insight as to what I’m talking about and where I’m coming from for this game. I didn’t play the first Army of Two because it looked profoundly uninteresting and unnecessary. But I wasn’t the target demographic of “Yeah Bro!” I don’t like to play games with other people if I can help it, so when I get a game the first thing I consider is how much fun I can have playing it alone and how long said fun will last. The Modern Warfare games are good games for multiplayer, but the single player modes scream, “Rent Me” rather than “Day-One Purchase.”

Got a buddy? Hopefully they know what they're doing, otherwise they won't be your buddy for long.

Army of Two: The 40th Day returns with the same concept of the first; that of Salem and Rios (or whatever, it’s not like names mean anything to characters anymore for any game that has guns and grenades) are an army of two guys who must work together to be the biggest and baddest guys with guns in the entire world. Needless to say, they’re mercenaries, a profession that I also don’t see the fascination with since mercenaries are, by nature, hired guns with no emotion. If they display any emotion, they aren’t mercenaries anymore; they’re just chaotic one-dimensional characters with guns.

Obviously, I’m Still Bitter

Still, I’m digressing (perhaps something to talk about on a Let’s Think Deep article in the future). The point is, Stock Character 1 and Stock Character 2 must do…something that involves Shanghai. I don’t know, there isn’t a whole heck of a lot to keep my interest since, as I’ve said, I’m not big on these “Yeah Bro!” games. Anyway, the core gameplay mechanic revolves around the requirement of both characters being used while playing. The game is best suited for two-player co-op, but a single gamer can play along with a computer-controlled partner. A lot of the time it actually works better since the computer knows exactly what it’s doing this time around, so you can literally just sit back most of the time and let the game play itself. Naturally, I hate that, too.

Just shoot him and move on with the plot already.

Okay, so I’ll stop being grumpy for a bit and tell you what the game is doing well. Yes, it has made some major improvements over the first title in the series (good Lord it’s a series now). The multiplayer modes are still relatively forgettable, but the co-op campaign has some good stuff going for it. You will actually enjoy the story if this is your sort of game. I can step back and say that much with confidence: The campaign is enough to justify a rental rather than a pass. Just remember that you can rip through the game in one long sitting of six hours or so and there are few unlockables to keep you returning for more unless you want to get every mask possible for the duo or really like playing rock, paper, scissors during a tense fire-fight. Not kidding about that last part.

So yes, the game isn’t awful. You can find lots to like here, but can I stop for a moment and mention one of the big “features” Army of Two: The 40th Day is happy about? Okay, you ready? Morality Choices! Sigh. Sigh again, just for effect. I’m getting pretty sick of the morality choices in games since they seem about as stupid as “Punch this guy in the face or don’t, you have the choice!” These guys are mercenaries, since when do they have morals beyond “Highest Bidder Wins, Yo”? I’m still being unfair, and I realize this, but I don’t care about morality choices in a video game since that all breaks down to the level of what the developers feel is a morality choice and what I feel is a morality choice. Given the option, I would play the entire game without killing a single person, just because that’s what I would ATTEMPT to do in real life. I don’t have that option, so, morality choice denied. I can choose between shooting a tiger or not shooting a tiger, but not adopting the tiger or calling an agency that deals specifically with endangered species and having them deal with the choice. I’m a hired gun with a mission to do, why should I care about tigers?!

Okay, I’m a little all over the place here, aren’t I? You want a verdict? Parents, keep your kids away from this and all games like this as it will infect them with the worst case of Stupid that I can accurately identify. If you’re already past the age where you need to be protected from Stupid and Army of Two: The 40th Day looks fun, it probably is. A lot of people will find something to like here. The game plays well for as long as it decides to and if you enjoy it the first time around you’ll enjoy it again and again. If it sounded cool to you when you heard about it, then that’s all you need to know. It’ll be cool if you want it to be.

Sure it’s almost 2010.  But more importantly, there seems to be a great schism happening between gamers on the Xbox.  Halo held the top spot and redefined First Person Shooters.  Then along came Gears of War and the bar was set for Third Person Shooters from then on out.  Gears of War 2 is out now and already being enjoyed for all the right reasons, but does it put itself above Halo as the most popular franchise on the 360?

Who cares?

I’m not dealing with popularity here, nor am I dealing with fanboyism between Xbots and PS3 diehards.  Gears 2 is a good follow up to a good first game and I don’t mind seeing more Gears games.

For those of you who played the first Gears of War, the plot revolves around Marcus Fenix, a tough soldier fighting against The Locust, a species of…aliens or monsters or something, I don’t know, I wasn’t paying too close attention.  The important plot point to realize goes as thus: The world got annihilated by The Locust and now Marcus Fenix and a few other soldiers are one-man-armies, (well, maybe two-man-armies), about to bring the fight back to The Locust.  The second game picks up with Marcus on his wacky journey to the center of the earth.  Oh, and it’s straight-up awesome.

Gears is known for its cover system during firefights.  If you attempt to play this game like a FPS and rush into trouble, you’re probably gonna get scrubbed.  You need to stay down until the opportune moment to huck a grenade or score a headshot and the fluid cover system allows everything to play near perfectly.

Gears 2 keeps things fast-paced and interesting throughout the single player mode and makes for great co-op play with a friend.  Online multiplayer is done pretty spot on as well now that the initial release-day bugs have been repaired.

It should be obvious, but Gears of War 2 is rated M and definitely earns the rating.  The Lancer is a rifle with a chainsaw attached to it and curbstomps are mandatory moves for playing correct.  No kids allowed, please.  Especially online.

Master Chief, eat your heart out.

Okay, is anyone really wondering if the sequel to Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare is any good? I almost feel worthless here trying to talk about Modern Warfare 2 as anything I say is basically irrelevant (a stark contrast to how things usually work with me). But the bottom line is that Modern Warfare 2 is a good game for both the Xbox 360 and the PS3 and makes a good holiday gift. So what more should I cover?

First off, should kids be playing this: No they should not. Kids, you have years and years ahead of you to enjoy life and not worry about wars and being told you’re a newb by someone that’s obviously better than you. The game contains adult themes and only people over 18 are immature enough to grasp such themes. Plus, no one wants to hear you on Xbox Live and your poor playing is making strangers dislike you. Unless you’re totally a cool guy and you know how to play well.

The Best Game FPS of The Season

Well, for starters I can give some pointers at how best to enjoy the game. For those of you playing MW2 for the story, you’re in luck, though I highly suggest you play through the first Modern Warfare before tackling the sequel. MW2 picks up five years after the events of the first game and it really shows. You’ll have a hard time following all the finer details if you aren’t already caught up to speed, plus you’ll miss out on the drama the story intends to create.

Still, Some Caution

I’d like to talk about the mild controversy surrounding the game for a second and then I promise I’ll get right back into the review. There is a point where you play as a group of terrorists and it can get extremely uncomfortable, to the point where you may not wish to play this part of the single player campaign again. However, this isn’t a bad thing.

This means Infinity Ward (the game’s developer), is doing a good job on a story level of creating aspects of the plot that hit on a gut-level and cause discomfort. That’s a good thing as any competent writer will tell you that the best thing you can do is force the audience to become uncomfortable with an aspect of the story because it feels too real or hits too hard (such as killing off a well-loved character and keeping them dead). Still, don’t let impressionable young gamers play this one. I’ll talk about that more later, but here’s the first warning.

Graphics Are At Their Best

Good, back to the review. You’ll notice that MW2 is graphically amazing. I get bored talking about graphics and I’m sure you get bored hearing about them but just take a look at some of the screenshots I have posted around here. Wait, let me get one for you.

Savor it for a moment.

See the amount of detail going into this game? Levels are extremely detailed to the point that you don’t just think, “Oh, this is the snow level,” but rather you get a sense that this is a snippet of the world this game takes place in. Every part of this game is working to establish environment and make the world feel more real and for the most part it works. You’ll have numerous times where the graphics will stun you.

Gameplay Also Superb

So let’s move past the graphics and into gameplay. Yeah, boring to talk about gameplay, too, as it either works or it doesn’t and the only time it’s fun to discuss a game’s controls is when they don’t work. Well they work great here. Hardcore fans of FPS’s may find the semi-auto aiming to simplify the game, but with the amount of enemies in any given level it’s hard to believe anything over 5% of players could ever hold their own. It works as a necessity and it works well.

Sadly, the single player campaign is short. I’m talking maybe 8 hours short, and that is only if you haven’t mastered the art of the FPS (I could probably get a lot more playtime out of the single player campaign than most of you, if that says anything about my abilities). The gold of the game doesn’t come from the campaign though; you’ll be sticking around for months because of the multiplayer.

Multiplayer For The Win

Protip: Getting in between a spray of bullets and a suckapunk is always a bad idea.

Dang, I probably should have simply told you MW fans that the multiplayer portion of MW2 is just as good, if not better, than the first game. That could have saved you a lot of time, right? Well you have nothing to fear other than a lack of interest for the first game since MW2 knows how to make multiplayer experiences work on an expert level. There isn’t a complete revolution of design here but I wouldn’t want a complete revolution of design any more than y’all probably want since it goes against the old adage of “If it ain’t broke, don’t mess with Modern Warfare’s multiplayer.” Ah the number of times my dad told me that as a kid.

Reading this review is just taking precious time away from playing Modern Warfare 2 and you know it.

Parents, just be aware of what your kids are playing and explain the difference between fantasy and real life so that they don’t do something they’ll regret later on, like calling someone at school a newb without realizing that person can see them and beat them up.

They are shooting pure joy from my heart.

Halloween is pretty much here, but for some of us that doesn’t mean much. Why is that? Well we’re too busy playing video games to care what’s happening around us. As a result, we may accidentally pass up the day in lieu of just playing something bright and cheery, but there are other options for us shut-ins that still want to celebrate Halloween with some good atmospheric games. So here are 10 Games You Should Play On Halloween.

Resident Evil 4:

Sure, the first game is great and the most recent installment is pretty good, but Resident Evil 4 knocked my socks off when I first played it on the GameCube all those years ago. It was the perfect mix of fluid gameplay with situations that terrified me to no end due to stuff like, oh, I don’t know, chainsaw wielding zombies or Wolverine-style monsters with their eyes sown shut. I freaked, but I never stopped playing.

The thing about RE4 is that it pushed games to be at least as good as it was by deciding what 3rd-person gameplay should be for shooters and what to expect with quick-time events (one of two games I was actually okay with the silly feature). You can pick up a copy for the GameCube, PS2, or PC, and the Wii has a version with motion controls that work extremely well (Amazon’s got it for under $15). Just do yourself a favor and play through if you haven’t already. Just tell me when you get to Del Lago.

Silent Hill 2:

This is Pyramid Head. This thing should not be.

I was forced to play both Silent Hill 1 and 2 by my friends and I made fun of them the whole way through, especially number 2. And why? Because I didn’t want to let on that I’d probably be crying unless I found a means of coping with fear since Silent Hill 2 throws you into a bad situation and just makes it worse. If you haven’t heard of a Silent Hill game, you probably live a happier life than I, otherwise Amazon has the PS2 version for around $10.

See, Silent Hill is a town that’s cursed since a little girl was pushed to become pure evil and fill the town with demons (yes, I hate it when this happens, too). The combat is awful on purpose as the main character isn’t a great fighter or solider. He just wants to find his dead wife because she told him to meet him in Silent Hill (if your dead anything ever says this, don’t go). You will see horrible things and you will hear horrible things and by the end of the game you will have had to do horrible things and you won’t sleep with the lights off for a while. Seriously, if you ever want to terrify someone who’s played a Silent Hill game, flick off the lights and blare a disaster siren. They will go hide in a corner; I guarantee it.

Super Ghouls & Ghosts:

And that's about as far as I get.

No, not every game has to be extremely terrifying to make for good Halloween playing. Super Ghouls & Ghosts (and really any entry in the Ghosts & Goblins series), will give you nightmares just realizing you can’t make it past the first level. I’ve put the game on easy, cranked up my lives, and still I couldn’t make it anywhere near the end of the first level. The first level! And I’m not a bad game player. I’ve even beat I Wanna Be The Guy (go search this on Google to see what it is), so you know I’m hardcore.

Super Ghouls & Ghosts has you jump in the shoes of Arthur on a quest to save a princess from a demon. Along the way, Arthur will die and die and die because he will be attacked by every manner of zombie and skeleton and unholy death with only two hits before he dies. If that sounds merciful, it isn’t. Ten hits before death is even being stingy. But the game is still worth playing even if you can’t make it past the first few zombies, so go find this on the SNES or the Virtual Console. In fact, this is so dificult that it looks like people are practically giving away used copies on Amazon for under $4.

Super Castlevania IV:

The box art sort of says it all.

Yes yes and more yes. I’m not going for scary here, I’m just telling you to go play games that put you in a Halloween mood and Super Castlevania IV (so super it needed it in the title), is such a good game that you’d be a fool to just let it pass you buy. It’s on the SNES but also on the Virtual Console, making it an extremely easy and affordable purchase.

Simon Belmont goes toe-to-toe with Dracula yet again, but at this point the structure of the Castlevania games is nearly perfected. The game is tough but fair and beating it yields a sweet sense of accomplishment that games don’t typically give anymore. Just whipping zombies and horrors and Death itself makes this one a game you should be playing anyway.

Luigi’s Mansion:

Don't care; Great game.

There I said it. Go play Luigi’s Mansion, one of the first titles released on the GameCube. It gets a bad rap but the game was great, albeit extremely short. So what better game to play through in a single day? This was Luigi’s big chance to shine (the only other game he’s starred in since Mario Is Missing and that doesn’t count), and while he doesn’t get a chance to stomp Goombas, he does get a chance to rid a haunted mansion of ghosts and spirits and such.

Surprisingly, this was one of the best looking games on the system, and it was a launch title. I always found that strange. You’re going around a mansion filled with ghosts and everything makes spooky noises. It’s cartoony but it works. It’s a small diversion but it pays off, especially since you can probably find this title for $5 at a video game store, Amazon inclued. Just think of it like Ghostbusters but with Luigi instead of Bill Murray.

Ghostbusters The Video Game:

Or heck, why not just play Ghostbusters The Video Game? It’s new this year on the PS3 and Xbox 360 (there is also a pretty good Wii version, too), and if you are wondering, yes, it is just what you’d expect from a Ghostbusters game. And by that I mean it’s awesome.

Those games on the NES from back in the day? Yeah, those sucked. This game is like seeing the 3rd movie that never was (but will be due to the high sales of the game). Bill Murray, Dan Aykroyd, and Harold Ramis all reprise their roles for the game, and for a video game that’s simply amazing. You play as the rookie, a nameless new guy that the other Ghostbusters don’t want to get attached to since they think you’ll probably get killed testing out the new equipment. The best part of the game is the humor, but they still don’t skimp on the actual gameplay, which is also great. It’s just the perfect lighthearted Halloween game to play, plus it’s under $20. Good deal.

Eternal Darkness:

No don't try to figure out what they're talking about. You'll just go insane.

But maybe you don’t want lighthearted. Maybe you want to go over the edge with insanity. So go ahead and pop in Eternal Darkness for the GameCube and watch your mind slowly retreat into itself to hide from whatever you’re about to see on the screen. This game was the answer to anyone that ever called the GameCube a kiddie system. You dare challenge me? Snag it on Amazon for $15 and prove me incorrect.

What sets Eternal Darkness above other horror games is the way you play through multiple characters’ doomed stories. You know that each of these characters will die by the end of their chapter, but you want to see where their section of the plot takes them. Naturally, it takes them to the brink of madness as you have both a health meter and a sanity meter to deal with. If your sanity gets too low then weird things start to happen like the TV volume fluctuating, the screen turning on and off, and even a message telling you that your memory card is being erased. I freaked out around the point that my character thought her head fell off and she had to go pick it up. Read that sentence one more time if you didn’t catch that. Oh yeah is this game messed up.

Dead Space:

That hand there isn't going back on any time soon.

Yup, another game for the 360, PS3, and PC with play control similar to Resident Evil 4. You are one of very few survivors left alive on a space mining facility where a plague of alien something or other…yeah, it doesn’t matter. All that’s important is the fact that crazy stuff happens all around you and you have to fight off hellish monsters with futuristic mining equipment. Also, that the game is a Bestseller, meaning it’s only $20 these days.

The main draw here is the ability to sever various limbs from the enemies in order to rendering them unable to walk or attack. Instead of headshots being the best way to go, some enemies had more of a weakness in their legs or midsection or something similar to that, making you have to rethink the genre slightly. Not by much, but just enough to be extremely creepy and keep you playing past every insane challenge that comes up.

Left 4 Dead:

At least the Dead Space guy's hand still had a thumb.

Okay, so you could play this on your 360, or you could play it right on the PC. I suggest the PC version. Left 4 Dead is a Valve title and currently it is one of their best (which says a lot). You are one of four characters alive after a zombie apocalypse and you must work with the others to stay alive through swarms of the typical zombie fare. You can play this as a single player, but the best reason to play Left 4 Dead is to blow zombies away with three friends in cooperative play.

This is simply one of the best multiplayer games on the market right now, and Valve has been hard at work delivering patches and new content and a sequel hitting not too long from now (which promises to be just as great, if not better). If you saw Zombie Land this past month, this is pretty much the game that the movie is based off of, even if it wasn’t aware of it.

Bioshock:

Why won't you love me?!

I will never stop telling everyone to go play Bioshock. Maybe it’s my own guilt for not playing it until just recently, but Bioshock stands out as a game that understands what it means to create atmosphere in order for things to be scary. Out on the 360, PS3, and now on Steam for the PC, everyone can play Bioshock and figure out what I’m going on about.

You play as a character that survives a plane crash and swims to a lighthouse in the middle of the ocean, only to find the entrance to the city of Rapture, a dystopian society that’s been utterly destroyed after people spliced their genes way too much for God to allow. You’ll get to encounter Big Daddies, Little Sisters, Splicers, and Andrew Ryan, my new favorite villain. I can’t wait until Bioshock is made into a movie since the plot alone has me sold.

And that’s my list off the top of my head. I promise that there is something here for everyone, from the hardcore gamers out there to the casual players. But I know this isn’t a complete list, so tell me what I left out. Are there some games I should be ashamed to omit? Let me know with a comment or two in the comments section and let your voice be heard.

At least it looks promising...

Immediately remove children from the vicinity of Wet for the PS3 and Xbox 360. Not for children, not for children, NOT FOR CHILDREN. You have blood, gore, violence, and, possibly worse, usage of the F word. It’s rated M, so keep that in mind for the tikes. There are plenty of other games for them to play. Actually…there are plenty of other games for everyone to play instead than Wet.

Wet is another one of those games that isn’t bad enough to condemn, but it isn’t good enough to recommend to friends besides a passing, “Oh yeah I rented that; it was alright.” That’s what we’re faced with here. A game that isn’t horrible but certainly isn’t worth the $59.99 (unless it’s a gift, then spend all you’d like on me).

The game is tough to describe. Actually I’m just being lazy. It’s super easy to describe. Mix grindhouse cinema with quicktime events and bullet time and throw in some half-dressed woman. There, that is Wet.

Gameplay revolves around sliding around in bullet time (the act of slowing everything around you to prolong the game’s length), so that you can lock onto enemies and fire never ending supplies of bullets into an even greater supply of never ending enemies. You will slide around. All. The. Time. The game should have been called Slip N’ Slide rather than Wet. It looks like the whole game was built around the mechanic anyway.

Okay, that looks pretty awesone, but The Matrix is suing.

Graphically, meh. Sound is decent with a sweet music selection, but a tracklist isn’t the best reason to slap down some cash…unless we’re talking about a Guitar Hero or Rock Band game. Everything just comes down to the controls and while they work well most of the time you’re still dealing with a lot of repetition and virtually no replay value.

Acrobatics without any real physics.

I would still recommend renting Wet at least once if you can get a good deal on it. Definitely not worth a full $9 rental, but if you’ve found some coupons or have a membership with a rental site, then Wet is a good waste of time for roughly two days. Of course if quicktime events are the bane of your existence, pass this one up as you’ll deal with a lot of them, especially during boss battles.

Lame, yes, but at least the game looks cool.