How do you outdo one of the best underrated games on the GBA? Let's find out.

When we last left off, I was talking about the adventure of Isaac, Garet, Mia, and Ivan to stop the four lighthouses of the world from being lit. By the time the first Golden Sun wraps up, two of the four lighthouses have beacons atop them, shining brightly as glorious failures. Then, right before the credits roll, the four hop on a ship and set off for the next stage of their journey.

This is where The Lost Age picks up, except you aren’t playing as the four from the first game. Rather, you start as Felix, Jenna, and Sheba, characters that appeared sparingly in the first game. Felix is Jenna’s brother, back from the dead and apparently set on a course to light the lighthouses despite being warned not to, whereas Jenna and Sheba were taken against their wills and forced into the conflict. The three set out to finish their task, but to do that they’re going to need a ton of new Psynergy to accomplish this goal. Eventually they meet Piers, a new character, to round out the group of four.

The game is immediately familiar for those who played the first title. None of the mechanics have changed in the slightest. Each character has a limited number of inventory slots, meaning that they can only carry a select few items like weapons or armor or healing potions, forcing you to be a bit choosier as to who has what in their possession and what Djinn they have equipped as this will affect what Psynergy they have access to and how effective they’ll be in battles and so on and so forth. None of the core mechanics change at all, even down to the littlest thing, like setting shortcuts to the L and R buttons for Psynergy outside of battles or the method of dealing with curses and downed party members. The Lost Age doesn’t reinvent the wheel, but rather gives it a long stretch of land to really show what it can do when it has some space to get rolling.

If you're not paying attention, you'll have sworn you had just sene this game...

I don’t have exact numbers, but I’d say The Lost Age is a little less than twice as long as the original Golden Sun. I felt a much greater sense of freedom to explore the world since relatively early on you acquire a boat that lets you get to half of the world via the vast ocean. Sadly, there were a huge number of times where I had absolutely no clue where I was supposed to go, forcing me to check online to make sure I wasn’t just going around in circles. I still don’t see that as a bad thing though as I much prefer an RPG that’s so large it’ll take a while to figure out where you need to go next. Then again, I’m the sort of gamer who enjoys finding something new around every corner, seemingly of my own accord and curiosity.

As is standard with the Golden Sun games, these diversions certainly pay off with major dividends. Going off the beaten path down a side passageway usually leads you to an incredibly powerful weapon or a new Djinn, making the rest of the game feel easier, or at the very least like you’ve been playing smarter. Plus, each special weapon has its own Unleash Attack completely unique to that weapon, and while the first game had a handful of awesome Unleash Attacks, The Lost Age has some that look and act even better. I’m particularly a fan of Megiddo, an Unleash Attack that sends the character into the air to slam a giant fireball down to earth onto your opponent. The sense of power the game accomplishes is amazing.

Hellz yeah!

Something I didn’t really mention in my discussion of the first game but that becomes abundant here is the lack of grinding you tend to put yourself through. As the world opens up to you, just searching around will send you into a handful of encounters, enough so that you’ll be gaining experience and money at an alarming rate, meaning that very few boss battles are a real problem in terms of needing to grind. Rather, a lost battle typically means you need to rethink your strategy of Djinn usage or Psynergy selection. The only real exception is the final battle. That boss pulls so many shenanigans it’s not even fair, but then again that’s what a good final boss does, am I right?

Everything here just feels better. The music is even better than the first, offering some tracks that I’d find myself going out of my way to listen to. I’m partial to the ocean battle track, or even the standard battle track. But as I said, everything just feels better here with more to do by far. I kept getting new Psynergy powers that allowed me to access even more areas and still I was never entirely sure what I’d learn next.

Probably the point where the game takes a drastic change is relatively late in the game where I will certainly be giving spoilers away by telling you. You ready? Here come the spoilers!

Seeing Judgment return as a summon isn't the spoiler. Judgment just doesn't want you to be ill prepared for spoilers, that's all. Also I spoiled it earlier anyway.

Eventually your new party runs into your old party from the first Golden Sun, a reunion that does two very cool things. The first is incorporate your old party into your new party, effectively making your new team consist of eight members instead of just four, though there can still only be four out at one time. The second thing that happens is Isaac talks, and pretty casually at that. I was jarred just a bit when he first spoke because this was the main character from the first game, a typical silent protagonist, a role that Felix takes up here as odd as it feels since he spoke so freely in the previous game. However, allowing Isaac to speak pleased me on a level I didn’t expect, mostly because his dialogue didn’t feel stereotypical of the “hero” character. Instead, he sounds like he gets it, making him one of the few characters in a dialogue scene not asking “What’s going on?” I loved that.

Overall, it’s tough to recommend just The Lost Age. Don’t play this one first. Just don’t. You’ll get vastly more if you play Golden Sun first, then follow this right up. Between the two you can easily manage over 60 hours of gameplay, assuming you aren’t going for full completionist work, and that comes at a price of probably under $30 for the pair of games. You really can’t go wrong here.

You'll most likely thank me later.

So who out there has already played The Lost Age? Leave a comment and let me know your thoughts on the series. You know, go ahead and do it even if you haven’t played either game. Does this sound like the type of game you’d be interested in? I want to know. And with that I’m off to let Pokemon absorb my life for a little while now that Golden Sun isn’t soaking up all my DS’ playing time.

Want to know more of some Games You Should Have Played? Check these out:

-Games You Should Have Played: Tomb Raider 1 and 2

-Smash Bros: A Retrospective

-Games You Should Have Played: The Donkey Kong Country Trilogy

Cooler promotional art there never was.

In the early days of the Game Boy Advance, there was a lot of room to demonstrate why exactly an update to the holy handheld was required. Game Boy games were typically simple; even the RPG’s they yielded tended to be shallower then the SNES counterparts. The Game Boy Color gave us color (obviously), but beyond maybe the Pokemon games, there wasn’t much depth to handheld titles.

Camelot, a company previously known for making the Mario Golf and Mario Tennis titles, had a chance to try something extremely different than what they were known for. Instead of an arcade sports title, they made an RPG called Golden Sun, a game with enough flare to justify purchasing the GBA specifically to play it.

The main drive behind upgrading from the Game Boy Color to the Game Boy Advance was the processing power behind the colors and effects the system could generate, colors and effects the previous generation couldn’t possibly handle. What Golden Sun demonstrated within the very first minutes of the game was enough to say, “Yes, this is where handheld gaming is going.” And that’s even before the battle screens appeared.

Mm-mm, that's just tasty right there.

I was amazed when I first got into a battle and saw the level of detail in the characters, backgrounds, and even attacks. Golden Sun is gorgeous in presentation. You’d be hard-pressed not to say it’s stunning work laid out on a GBA screen. Not only does it show off how far superior it is to the GBC, it shows how it’s superior to even the SNES. Just watching the summons would push me over the edge of awesome. Go watch Judgment get called forth and tell me it isn’t one of the coolest attacks ever to make it into video games.

At the heart of every RPG is the story and Golden Sun certainly has one that got me curious. The game starts with Isaac and his best friend Garet running about in their village of Vale as a great tragedy occurs that forces Isaac to lose his father and his friend Jenna to lose her brother, Felix (wink wink). The story picks up three years later after Isaac and Garet have been training with the use of Psynergy, the energy force the game calls its magic system. They enter Sol Sanctum and get tricked into retrieving four elemental gem stars required to light the four elemental lighthouses of the world, an act that will supposedly destroy everything and be very, very bad. Supposedly. I think.

Sort of reminds you of Avatar...doesn't it?

While the story is somewhat slow and fairly basic at its core, there is a certain curious quality about it. I played the game to completion when I first purchased it, but as I remember correctly, I only completed two of the four lighthouses before the credits started rolling. Why? Because there is a sequel, The Lost Age, in which the story is resolved. I haven’t played that yet, much to my distress, but that will soon change as my wife recently found me a used copy for my birthday. My point is, Golden Sun as a stand-alone title leaves you begging for more, even though my first playthrough had me clocking over 40 hours. That’s a serious chunk of time for a GBA title.

Those that have played Golden Sun aren’t going to try and sell you on it based purely on the story, or even the graphics; they’ll try to sell you on the Djinn. Djinn are magical creatures you can collect throughout the game to the point that each of the four main characters can equip seven. The Djinn can be used in battle, each with its own special technique. The trade-off is that the Djinn provide stat-boosts for the characters, as well as abilities for the particular class the character happens to be. The more Djinn, the better the class, and the more varied the type of Djinn you have equipped, the more varied the class will be. When you use a Djinn, however, that stat boost and class change will be lost until it’s reequipped, done so by performing a Summon attack. Summon attacks require between one to four Djinn of the same type, allowing you to make use of the most devastating attacks in the game. Once summoned, the Djinn will then recharge and become reequipped to the various characters.

It’s this constant balancing of equipped and stand-by Djinn that make for a unique battle style in Golden Sun. While you may really, really want to use your Djinn and save up a few to unleash Judgment, you could be costing your character vital stats in the middle of the battle, or worse, forcing him to lose some of his key Psynergy such as Cure Well or Ragnarok. Even better, mixing around and playing with the Djinn combinations can become rather enjoyable since you can play it safe and dull (like I did) and use stack like-typed Djinn upon the characters with the same elemental type, or you can find grand combos that provide cooler attacks than ever before. Golden Sun provides a lot of room to experiment, room that players have seemed to enjoy.

No way! That totally IS Avatar!

My last little thing to mention regards naming the characters. I am a huge proponent of being allowed to name characters within video games whatever you’d like, permitting you to create your own narrative rather than just the one the game provides. It gives you the chance to forge a deeper connection to the story and the characters than you may otherwise have. Oddly enough, Golden Sun permits you to rename Isaac, but not the other characters…unless you know a cheat code. I happen to know said cheat code. I’ll leave you with the knowledge that if you’d like to rename the four playable characters, plus three others, enter Up, Down, Up, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, Up, Right, Down, Left, Up, and then Select while you’re on the screen where you can name Isaac. If done correctly you’ll hear a slight “ping.” You’re welcome.

So there you have it, a true Game You Should Have Played. Dark Dawn, the third game in the series, just released at the beginning of this week, so you might as well spend some time catching up before you dive head first into a righteously excellent game. I’ll leave you to comment on whether you’re a Golden Sun fan or not, but please, no spoilers here! I’m the only one allowed to spoil things!

Want more Games You Should Have Played? Check these out:

-Homeward Bound: More Earthbound For The US

-Games You Should Have Played: Super Mario Bros 3

-Games You Should Have Played: Final Fantasy III SNES

For a guy that's supposed to bear those crystals, he sure does look confused about what a crystal is.

I’m kind of curious about something. How many of you loved Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles on the GameCube? I bought it Day One thinking it was going to be the absolute best game I’d ever play for the rest of my life. I was pretty naïve back then.

Don’t get me wrong though, I absolutely loved the game for what it was and even played through it all again a few years later, but at the time my expectations were sorely unmet, partly because it promised a revolutionary multiplayer experience that cost way too much to enjoy: an experience that I never got a chance to try out since I didn’t have three other friends with Game Boy Advances and GBA Links to the GameCube. Regardless of all that I loved the first Crystal Chronicles game and saw a lot of potential in terms of story. Since then I’ve been waiting for a more substantial Crystal Chronicles title to deliver in terms of story. Well, here it is.

A Game For Some, A Joke For Others

The Crystal Bearers is the new title in the franchise for the Nintendo Wii. I had seen teasers for this one even before the Wii was out and already I was sufficiently psyched up since it looked awesome. Now that the game is finally out I can safely say that if you were like me and wanted the story-driven Crystal Chronicles game, you won’t be severely disappointed. If, however, you were looking for a game with amazing combat or anything, ANYTHING, that resembled either the Final Fantasy games as a whole or the Crystal Chronicles sub-franchise, yeah, move along, nothing to see here. The focus is story and it does it well. There are characters that you’ll like and some you’ll hate, but the point is that they’re all engaging. There is fun to be had.

It's harsh but sometimes the truth can hurt.

Unfortunately, the fun doesn’t go as far with the battle mechanic, though it does churn out a heck of a lot of enjoyable times just playing with whatever you can pick up. The main character, a guy named Layle (because video games need people with crazy names “just because”), is capable of telekinesis, so he goes around levitating things and throwing them around and whatever. Not incredibly deep, but the concept works well enough to get you through the game with a bit of practice. Sadly, the Wiimote will get in your way a few times since, as we’ve figured out by now, it isn’t the perfect controller Nintendo wanted it to be unless you’re playing Metroid Prime 3 or something. Just be happy when it works, which is most of the time, and forget when it has some hiccups. Nod and smile and keep going for sake of the story.

That cactus never stood a chance.

The other big downside is the shortness of the title’s playtime. It is going to sound odd but this is a Final Fantasy game with a very short playtime. I’m talking around 20 hours, roughly. Does that sound short to you? It will, especially since you’ll be enjoying the game so much. Oddly, the short playtime is a very good thing. While not all THAT short, it’s still short enough not to overstay its welcome but long enough to get you addicted to it. I’m not going to say it’s the perfect length, but it strikes a decent balance.

There isn’t a whole lot more to talk about. For a Wii game it looks fantastic as the world is solid and colorful and characters are lively and stand out and all that jazz. I recommend The Crystal Bearers and I’ll leave it at that. Parents, this one’s safe enough for just about any age of youngster out there, so don’t worry about it ruining their minds other than possibly being too “weird” for them to grasp. Still a fun game with a great story to like. For me, I’m satisfied.

More of these, please!

I just finished playing one of the strangest games I’ve ever seen. Earlier this year my wife bought me Earthbound for the Super Nintendo and now that I beat the game I can safely say that I’ll never play a game that crazy again. Why? Because no one will ever make a game quit like Earthbound.

One of The Best Games Ever

For those of you unaware what Earthbound is, it is an RPG on the SNES that stars Ness, a young boy chosen to save the earth from a space alien named Giygas and his hoard of baddies. During the game he’ll get the help of Paula, a psychic, Jeff, a genius inventor, and Poo, a prince from a mystic village. When the game first came out, Nintendo did all it could to push for a successful US launch, hyping the game with incentives such as a free players guide with the game and scratch and sniff stickers to entice fans with the weird factor. And few people bought the game.

Just the game will run upwards of $75 online.

Why was this? Well, the game is crazy. It’s an RPG but it isn’t like any RPG you’ve likely played. It gets cited numerous times for replacing the usual swords and spears as weapons with baseball bats and frying pans, but that’s not the big difference I saw. No, the game constantly does things that make you go, “Huh? Did they really say that?” Characters will point out that they’re in a game all the time, even referencing you as the player, asking for your name specifically every so often. You can expect a whole lot of crazy to befall you on your journey around Eagleland.

Focus On the Story, Not the Graphics

The problem with the game then and even more now is its lack of high-quality graphics. Earthbound didn’t attempt to push the SNES anywhere near its limits in ways that Chrono Trigger or Final Fantasy VI had done, so people brushed the strange game aside as an inferior example of a game. Honestly, if you take a quick look at screens you may think the game was made as a class assignment.

I wish I could find a meteor outside my house some day.

But what the game doesn’t do with graphics it does ten times over with story, pacing, music, and innovations. In a typical RPG battle your health bar will instantly go up or down when hit by an enemy or recovered by an ally. However, Earthbound has a different take on this with a counter system. If an enemy does a huge hit to you that’d normally kill you, your health points rapidly count down, but if an ally heals you before you die then your health goes back up. It makes for a very quick-paced situation every now and then but it sure helps to keep the game from being monotonous. Plus, this game can get tough if you aren’t careful.

Still, the game is forgiving by allowing you to keep all your progress when you die. I was so happy to discover that all experience and money and everything I did before I was killed remained even when I went back to my last save point. This is a huge relief compared to what happens in Final Fantasy games where you could be a few hours from your last save, die, and lose it all. Kudos for that.

Fans This Great Don’t Come Along Every Generation

Can we please have this Nintendo, please?

The best thing about Earthbound, by far, is its community. Go to www.starmen.net and check out the amount of devotion fans have for the Earthbound property. They love this game. The soundtrack has been remixed more than once with a special remix album given only to fans that truly prove their love of the Earthbound genre (like, maybe, posting an article about how great Earthbound is). Also, check out their deal on the Ness shirt, hat, yo-yo, and buttons. That’s sweet and I want them.

I told you all this to explain that Earthbound isn’t the only game in the series. Earthbound is actually the second game of three from the series known as Mother in Japan. The US got Mother 2 but never got the prequel or the sequel. Ever. Why the heck not?

Well, far as I can tell, Nintendo is extremely weary about making a risky venture such as localizing a property so random as Mother. They took the chance once, it didn’t pan out, and now they won’t do it again. We haven’t even received a re-release of Earthbound on the Game Boy Advance, DS, or the Virtual Console. Once again, why the heck not?

Here’s the problem: the soundtrack and tons of the references in the game come from copyrighted sources. The Runaway Five, a band that pops up a few times in Earthbound, is obviously a parody of the Blues Brothers. Also, you’ll swear you see Mr. T walking around every town. Even better, the soundtrack was inspired by The Beatles in a number of places (I can’t particularly point these places out), which leads to massive problems with what can and can’t be included in the game anymore.

Forget all that! The game is a parody through and through, which means all of these things fall under the coverage of the fair-use copyright law which states that you can pretty much use anything without worry of being sued as long as you’re doing so as a spoof, parody, or review (which, as a review writer, I love oh so much). It’s why Weird Al is able to make songs that sound exactly like other songs since he’s making parodies. The problem with copyright laws is still why Nintendo typically says they’ll never bring the Mother series back to the US, even in a re-released form.

Oh, but they tease us all the time. Ness has appeared in all three Super Smash Bros games, with Lucas, one of the main characters from Mother 3, appearing in Brawl. Jeff appears as an Assist Trophy in Brawl as well with multiple locations from the Mother series littering the stages such as Onett, Fourside, and New Pork City. Japan has seen both Mother 3 and a Mother 1+2 release for the Game Boy Advance, but since Earthbound, the US has got nothing.

Dinosaurs! Just...arg! Nintendo, come on!

Why is Nintendo still so scared of releasing these games stateside? Fans have been emphatic about wanting more Earthbound. Starmen.net has a full English translation for Mother 3 waiting for anyone that wishes to play it but doesn’t speak Japanese. Fans have already done the localization work! C’mon already! What more do you want?!

Who's gonna make the list?

I can’t stop thinking about the Super Mario series of games no matter how hard I try (which isn’t very hard actually). I keep coming back to my favorites and remember what made me fall in love with the plumber in the first place. So I thought, “Hey, New Super Mario Bros Wii is out now and this week is Thanksgiving, so what better time for me to rattle off my favorite Mario enemies?” I instantly agreed with myself and began searching through the Mario database to remember each and every enemy Mario has ever faced. After searching I discovered I couldn’t limit myself to just 10, so here it is, my list of the 20 Greatest Mario Enemies.

20. Wiggler:

Right, like this guy's gonna harm me?

One of the best parts about the Mario games is the way enemies don’t always make a whole lot of sense. Take Wigglers for example. Initially they look like cute, happy caterpillars just boppin’ around, doin’ their own thing with a pretty flower on their head. But then you stomp on their flowers and they go nuts. Suddenly they freak out, turn red, and bum rush you. All because the pretty flower is now gone. You heartless monster.

19. Blargg:

That's my reaction to Blarggs, too.

Fun to say, more fun to pretend to be. I’m assuming a Blargg is a type of fire dragon thing as they live in lava, only to pop their eyes out and lazily dive at you with a “Blargg!” sort of sound. Take a second now and go find your sister (or brother if he’s been particularly evil to you lately). Hide somewhere and when they come by, jump out with a “BLARGG!” If that isn’t fun, I don’t know what is.

18. Fawful:

Always play your Mario & Luigi before bed.

Sometimes people just don’t heed my advice. If you don’t know who Fawful is, you’re probably not heeding it. Have you heeded? I bet not. Go play Mario & Luigi: Superstar Saga and you’ll know exactly who this little bean of hilarity is. Known for his catchphrase “I have fury!” Actually, this may be the proper response to “BLARGG!”

17. Dino Piranha:

That's it, I'm replaying Super Mario Galaxy this week.

Super Mario Galaxy did a lot right, but it didn’t add too many new enemies that stood out for me. It did however bring back a favorite of mine in this Petey Piranha upgrade. The Dino Piranha is like Petey Piranha on steroids, and while I don’t endorse the use of drugs other than Super Mushrooms and Fire Flowers, I do support the revamped primal-urges of the Dino Piranha, such as “Destroy!” and “BLARGG!”

16. Francis:

It's like they took my high school self and made a video game character out of him.

The Paper Mario games have a way of getting funnier and funnier with each new sequel. When I heard about Super Paper Mario, I wasn’t too enthused since it wasn’t going to be an RPG like its predecessors but rather a 2-D/3-D platformer. And then I got to the third world and encountered Francis the chameleon, an uber nerd. When Princess Peach attempts attacking him, he boots Swoon.exe, a program that’s primary function is to talk to girls. I think this quote says it all: “Booting up Swoon.exe! Activating Nerd2Babe interface mod with real-time wooing!” That’s priceless.

15. Kriffid:

Beware the deadly fish-bush!

You’re going to find a good handful of Super Mario RPG enemies showing up here, with the first being Kriffid, a bush-like thing. Or maybe a fish-like thing? I think it’s closer to a fish-bush actually. The first time I encountered one of these things I thought there was a mistake and the game didn’t load the proper enemy. Then the bush opened up and a fish enemy scuttled around and wasted my face using electrical attacks. I’ve been terrified of bushes ever since, a trait shared only by a few select individuals in history such as Moses.

14. Super Koopas:

More powerful than the Justice League.

“Why haven’t we seen Koopas yet?” Is that what you’re asking? Well, I thought about them and determined that Koopas kinda suck. Yes, I enjoy them and all, but what does it say about you when you get stomped on and then killed with your own shell? That’s like if I was punched, my shirt fell off, and then someone strangled me with my own shirt. Well, Super Koopas don’t have that problem and they don’t take guff from no Mario. They can fly and they do so in groups, making normal left-to-right gameplay a massive hazard of flying doom.

13. Ptooie:

This is why I don't travel.

Ptooies are cheaters, plain and simple. I first saw these in Super Mario Bros 3 and since the day I witnessed a Piranha Plant walking about outside a pipe, keeping a spiked-ball suspended merely by blowing, I called foul play. Something about that just never seemed right to me as I was just used to the idea of deadly plants emerging from usually safe plumbing. Now suddenly they could walk about and become massive annoyances. No, that’s just too much. Red Flag called on account of absurd.

12. Jinx:

The original Napoleon Complex.

Here’s another from Super Mario RPG, and while I love this enemy, you don’t technically have to fight him if you don’t want to or if you suck at the game. The picture there doesn’t really do him justice as this dojo master is roughly the size of Mario’s foot, yet can lay the smackdown like no body’s business. He’ll leap at you with a flying kick, jump behind you and explode your Achilles tendon, or just hit you with a giant bullet that comes from nowhere. Simply, this guy owns you.

11. The Koopalings:

Glad to see you back, but what took so long?

Well, they didn’t quite break the top 10, but they came close. Why don’t they make it higher? Well, they got overshadowed by Bowser Jr, that’s why. First seen in Super Mario Bros 3, each Koopaling had its own airship and my budding gaming skills were no match for their “Jump on me three times” defenses. They returned in Super Mario World to get beaten again, and once more in Mario & Luigi: Superstar Saga. Finally they get revived for New Super Mario Bros Wii and for that I couldn’t be happier. But still, I’ve got better enemies waiting just ahead.

10. Fuzzy:

Remember kids: Don't do drugs.

“Touch Fuzzy. Get Dizzy.” Simple words for a simple concept. Everyone that’s played Yoshi’s Island knows what a Fuzzy is. Think of them as our real-world equivalent of a kick to the head, or really cheap beer (I prefer the kick to the head). If Yoshi so much as brushes up against these little puffs the screen gets distorted and causes much difficulty with controls. All you can do is just sit and wait for the effects to wear off.

9. Angry Sun:

Why I don't leave my house when the sun's out.

Super Mario Bros 3 was a hard game because everything wanted you dead. Even the sun. Yes, the sun would scowl at you from the sky until it eventually couldn’t take any more and began dive-bombing every chance it got. And it wouldn’t even smile if it killed you, either. I remained angry. You’d go “Whoop! I died!” and fall off the screen, but the sun would still scowl like you’ve caused him far too much grief for your death to matter anymore. What did you do to him anyway? Did you murder the sun’s son in a previous game? Something to think about.

8. World 1-1 Goomba:

"AHHH Motherland!"

No other enemy on this list has as many kills racked up as this one simple murder machine. Goombas as a people are pitiful, stupid enemies that hobble back and forth, hoping you’ll step in front of them as they slowly bump into you. But this one lone solider stands as the very first enemy Mario encounters in Super Mario Bros and somehow year after year, new players pick up the controller unaware that they should jump over this stupid Goomba and instead suffer the ultimate fate. Even worse is when a seasoned player loses patience and rushes headfirst into death by accident while their friends shake their heads in shame. Yes, I’m speaking from experience.

7. Booster:

I wish I looked like this.

One of the most memorable characters from Super Mario RPG was this rough-faced scoundrel that goes by the name Booster. He has his own tower that he typically just plays around in while riding a train, but Princess Toadstool fell from the sky after the events at the beginning of the game and landed on his balcony. Therefore, he figures he should marry her since he’ll get a cake out of it. Pretty much, I sort of want to grow up to become this guy some day.

6. Pionpi:

These WILL kill you, no arguing.

Super Mario Land was always odd to me, since the English version didn’t change the Japanese enemies’ names. I always thought they should have renamed everything so you could describe them easier to your friends, since we did that anyway. “You know those Jumpy-Spiders?” “Oh, you mean Kumos?” “No, I mean Jumpy-Spiders, jerk.” By the time you get to the fourth world, which has a very distinctly “Chinese” vibe to it, you encounter enemies that look like Chinese people hopping around without much thought. They’re actually called “Pionpi” and are based off of ghouls known to Japanese people, but come on, they look just like evil Chinese people mindlessly hopping back and forth. Like I’m going to listen to Japanese developers when they says, “No seriously, we weren’t making fun of Chinese stereotypes or anything.” Don’t believe you. Plus, these enemies never die! They just get mad!

5. Boss Bass:

I know you've been eaten by one of these at least once.

BLARGG! Second only to that stupid World 1-1 Goomba in aggravating deaths, Boss Bass is the fish from Super Mario Bros 3 that swims around and hops every so often. If it catches you in its mouth, instant death. No chance to get out of it, you just die. You can kill these with a well-timed throw of a block or a shell, with a fireball, or even just grab a star and give the jerk a taste of his own medicine. But then he comes back! What the heck?! These should have been called “Blarggs” instead of those lava dragons.

4. The Rawk Hawk:

"Can you smell what the Rawk is cookin'?!"

Now we’re talking. “Are you ready to get RAWKED?!” Yes, I am ready. You have a brief stint as the Great Gonzales partway through Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door where you fight your way through the Glitz Pit to take on the champion. And who is the champion? A hawk that knows Lucha-style moves and spews catchphrases similar to Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson. If he’s losing he’ll even jump up to the rafters and shake down debris. I was almost sad to kick his butt.

3. The Koopa Bros:

They're the world's most fearsome fighting Koopas!

C’mon, like I’m not going to include the obvious Ninja Turtle reference? The Koopa Bros show up as the first real bosses of Paper Mario and do a fairly competent job of dealing some punishment should you not focus your attacks very well on stopping their ultimate attack of hopping into each other’s backs and launching a spinning tackle. Plus they get cool theme music to beat your face in. I really want to see these enemies come back but we haven’t seen a bit of them since the end of Paper Mario.

2. The Axem Rangers:

Go Go Axem Rangers!

First the Ninja Turtles, now Power Rangers? You bet your sweet bippy. My favorite enemies from Super Mario RPG came near the end but when they showed up I was totally blindsided. I got destroyed the first few times I tried fighting this hardcore team of Smithy’s most loyal but with enough practice I figured out the secret. However, no fight with them is ever simple since each member gets an attack and the Black Ranger attacks twice. They can scrape your sorry team in one move if you aren’t careful. And once you knock out all five, that’s it, right? Wrong! They get behind the Megazord head and fire the Breaker Beam at you, leaving you clinging for dear life.

So who can possibly beat super Koopas, Blarggs, giant fish, cheating plants, Chinese stereotypes, a Lucha chicken, the Ninja Turtles, and the Power Rangers? Oh, I think you know.

1. Giga Bowser:

"Please give me all your faces for I now own them!"

Like there was any doubt who was going to top this list? Bowser appears in just about every single Mario game and causes more than his share of chaos, but Bowser felt a little too simple to top the list. In comes Super Smash Bros Melee with a final boss battle against a Bowser reborn as Giga Bowser. Basically, take Bowser and increase his killing power, making him an unstoppable force of destruction. All he has to do is headbutt you and dark energy sparks from his noggin. Why? Who cares? Giga Bowser could take on every enemy on this list and not even lose a life, and that’s why he makes the top of the list.

Do you disagree with my list? I bet you probably do since everyone has his or her own favorites to talk about. So tell me about them with a comment or two. There are hundreds of enemies in the Mario universe and I only touched on 20. There’s plenty of room for your voice to get heard, so let’s hear it!

Nintendo has never shied away from making what some would call “risky” moves, something the Wii has shown us with gusto. I had the classic gray brick Game Boy as a kid until finally the Game Boy Advance did away with the need for any previous Game Boy iteration. But it wasn’t to last, as the Advance SP came out and made me extremely jealous of its backlit glory and rechargeable battery core. And then came the DS, and I was hooked all over again.

The first Christmas the DS was out, I was lucky enough to get it sneakily wrapped in a box with a shot put to throw me off, (no pun intended). I had the Alpha version of the system, so when the Omega came out as the DS Lite, I was jealous again but refused to drop the cash for the definite new upgrade.

Now we have the DSi, yet another upgrade to the DS, but this time we’re losing some aspects as well, and it makes me very sad. The drawing point of the DS for me was the inclusion of a Game Boy Advance slot, allowing me to play Advance games on my DS without having to spend copious amounts on batteries, as well as having it backlit at last. But the DSi doesn’t have a slot for Advance games, eliminating it to make room for two cameras and new internal memory. The loss of the Advance slot was what kept me from upgrading.

But we’re not just losing everything here. We are gaining the use of a new service that allows us to download DSiWare games, and while the majority of them are just fancy clocks, there are a few shining examples of excellent titles. Basically anything listed under the Art Styles logo is considered fantastic, but I still haven’t been convinced to plunk down my money for another full system when my original DS works just fine.

As noted, two cameras have been added to allow for you to take pictures and then dink around with them similar to the Game Boy Camera from the old days. But the quality is roughly the same as a decent cell phone, so the feature is somewhat underutilized at the moment, lacking the drawing power it’s attempting to sell the system with. It also gets an Internet browser, but once more, nothing a decent phone can’t do.

All in all, while the DSi isn’t a bad system, if you already have a DS there’s really no fantastic reason to buy the DSi, especially at $169.99. Then again, if you don’t already have a DS, now may be a good time to give it a try.

Metroid Fusion: Metroid became my bread and butter after I first got a chance to play Metroid Fusion, (I’m still terrible at them, but I readily consume them if possible).  The game is tough, especially if you want to get the best ending, (beat the game with 100% items in under 2 hours), but it is so worth it.  I still pop this one in and play it every now and then. Amazon can hook you up with a copy for under $15.

Golden Sun: RPG’s are everywhere on the Advance, but this was one of the first and still one of the best.  The graphics were amazing for a handheld, (still amazing actually), and everything about Golden Sun kept me playing for hours.  Overlooked, but simple to find and cheap to play.  Go get it.

Advance Wars: I am bad with tactical games, but not Advance Wars.  I picked this one up on a whim and it was one of the best whims I’ve ever picked a game up on.  There are a handful of sequels including a DS version, but if you’re strapped for cash, you can’t go wrong with this original.  It’ll keep you busy for quite a while.

Mario & Luigi: Superstar Saga: If you’re still waiting for Super Mario RPG 2, then this may tide you over for a while.  The Mario & Luigi series doesn’t get nearly as much love as it should, but the games speak for themselves. Get yourself started/hooked on this series as soon as possible.

Wario Land 4: Surprisingly, there were no new Mario games made specifically for the Advance.  However, Wario saw the fourth game in his series come to the Advance, and it was pretty darn good.  Truly a worthy platformer for a worthy system.

Be sure to check out more of my video game reviews here.