Play Pokémon? Maybe, but never like this you haven’t. Join Chase as he tells the tale of Pokémon Soul Silver in our newest series.
Welcome to Episode One of my Let’s Play of Pokémon Soul Silver! A couple quick notes before we begin. First, this will be a hardcore mode play through. For those of you not familiar with Nuzlocke’s brilliant webcomic, this essentially means I’m purposefully enforcing rules on myself to make the game harder. Specifically, I can only catch the first Pokémon I see on each route, I can only buy one Pokeball at each mart, I can’t level grind more than one level past that of the strongest Pokémon in a Gym leader’s arsenal, and if a Pokémon faints, it is treated as if it died, and I have to release it into the wild. There are other rules limiting potions and restricting battle tactics, but those are the essentials. Second, I will be portraying the part of my in-game character. Stuff he thinks will be in italic type, and my thoughts will be normal type. Cool? Cool. Let’s get started.
Let’s Play, Day One
Today was easily the greatest day of my ten-year-old life. It all started when Professor Oak started explaining that I live in a world of Pokémon and telling me all about them. Given I’ve lived in this world for ten years now and have seen Pokémon on a regular basis my whole life, I’d usually have found this strange. But everyone knows Professor Oak has lost it in his old age, so I just smiled and nodded. I don’t think he even heard my properly. Oh well.
Professor Oak pretty much has to be senile, right? I mean, the boy and girl character models don’t even begin to look similar. If they’re going to try to play it as actually being hard to tell, shouldn’t they make the character really androgynous? I mean, there should still be two character models, one leaning slightly toward male and the other toward female, but they should at least be questionable enough that he’d have to stop and decide that he needed to ask to make sure. They’re ten. This shouldn’t be that hard.
Also, given Oak is definitively senile, I thought it would be great to put my name as “…”. This has brought even more hilarity than expected. Whenever someone talks to you, it looks like they’ve completely forgotten your name. Even the omniscient narrator is like “… used a potion!” as if to say “Dang, I have no idea who this person is. Maybe if I move on quickly, no one will notice”. Highly recommend it if you’ve already finished the dirty joke repertoire.
I came downstairs, and Mom started doing that over possessive thing that moms tend to do. I mean, I know I just turned ten, and it’s hard for her to let go, but she tried to give me directions to Professor Birch’s lab. He’s lived next door to me since I was two. He’s the only laboratory in town, and there are only two other houses in all of New Bark! How lost can I really get?
How boring must life be before you get a Pokémon? I mean, there are only two houses in the whole city, and you can’t travel anywhere else because wild animals will attack you. That has to be a horrible way to live one’s existence.
As I walked out, there was a pretty strong windstorm. Of course, that Lyra girl’s stupid Marill walked right up to me before Lyra finally figured out a storm was probably a bad place for Pokémon. She didn’t even say hi when she picked Marill up. It was weird. I’m really hoping leaving for this adventure means I’ll never see her again. If there’s one thing I’ll miss about New Bark Town, it’s my ability to randomly enter people’s houses and just say hi. Sure, they never really have anything interesting to say; heck, Lyra’s dad had the nerve to insult my lack of Pokémon even after I told him I was on my way to get one. Still, it’s nice just knowing I can break and enter without any negative consequences.
Given how laissez-faire people are on the whole “entering their house uninvited” thing, I’m amazed there aren’t more groups like Team Rocket trying to steal things. They could just walk in, start a conversation, and nick some silverware or maybe a bit of jewelry. They don’t even watch over you as you go into their upstairs, if they have an upstairs. If I ever get to transport into the world of Pokémon, I might have to take advantage of this.
As I’m about to enter the lab, I notice a weird, red-haired kid staring through the window looking at Elm’s Pokémon. I try to invite him in to come get one with me, but he just shoves me away. I don’t understand why he doesn’t just ask for a Pokeball, especially when Professor Elm just gives me one the moment I come in. It seems like a simple problem to solve. Oh well. I’m probably never going to see him again, so I guess it’s not my problem.
Of course, while getting Elm to agree to give me a Pokémon was easy, picking the right one was far more difficult. I decided on Totodile, because he was easily the cutest of the three. I know it’s not the manliest decision I’ve ever made, but come on! How could you resist those eyes? I decided to call him “Bitey”. He doesn’t like his name much yet, but I’m sure he’ll grow into it in time. I can’t worry about it right now; I have to go see Mr. Pokémon!
I’ve always had a lot of questions about Mr. Pokémon. Like, how did he become Mr. Pokémon? Did he win a contest? Did he earn the title? Are there multiple Mr. Pokemon’s? Can I become Mr. Pokémon? Do I have to defeat the old Mr. Pokémon to become the new one? That seems less likely because he’s a scientist. Maybe it’s a science battle? I don’t know, but I feel like the origins of Mr. Pokémon would have been a great spinoff story.
Well before I head out, I decide to go say goodbye to my mom since, you know, I’m going to be off travelling the world and everything. I’m really excited when I get my old Pokegear back from the shop, but then she ruins the moment by explaining how it works to me despite the fact I told her I already know how it works. Sometimes, I feel like she doesn’t listen to me. Then again, I can’t really make fun of her lack of social tact when my mom is the only number in my phone. Sure, there are only, like, five other people in my whole town, but that’s still pretty lame.
Right before I leave, Professor Elm stops me to give me his number. I guess I’m glad I came home to see Mom after all. Otherwise, this would have been really awkward. Tomorrow, I’ll be off on my adventure. But for now, I think I’ll just get some sleep standing up right on the outskirts of town.